Will Sex Make Him Love Me More?

Often women ask me, "Will sex make him love me more?" This is like asking, "Will a child love me if I give her a cupcake?"

Well, assuming most all children love cupcakes (men love sex), you have to take into consideration the relationship that you have with the child.

If it's your child, then she loves you and will probably feel so honored to be receiving a cupcake, because it will feel like a gift of love.

If it's not your child and you have a casual relationship, she may be very pleased and grateful to get a yummy treat from you, but it isn't going to make her love you anymore than she does now.

Cupcakes alone don't make a child love you and sex alone doesn't make a man love you.

If you are married and want your husband's affections, then show more excitement in the bedroom. Husbands love and need that. (Sex is a way of expressing love to men in committed relationships).

If you have a boyfriend who is crazy about you, do the same.

If you have a boyfriend who seems like he's drifting away from you, you need to communicate about the relationship, not just get tarted up in some lingerie and hope that brings him back. He could be feeling like other areas besides the sex are the problem, and if that's true, sex with you will make him feel even more guilty and unsure.

If you are sleeping with a man who has not given you sexual exclusivity, than no amount of sex is going to make him love you. In fact, the opposite is more likely. If you can put your foot down and your boundaries up, and tell the man you love that he ain't gettin' the milk for free no more and needs to buy the cow, then you may make him feel like your price tag went up. This will make you more desirable. And if he just walks out the door because no-strings sex has become "stringy", then all the better that he left!

The best way to communicate your insecurities surrounding his feelings for you is to refrain from blame, judgment and criticism when you speak with him. You should also refrain from trying to illicit a certain result from the conversation. If he doesn't show interest in committing further to you, you have to resist the urge to "pull" him toward you by trying to convince him otherwise. Simply share your feelings and respect his feelings the way you hope he respects yours. What you CAN do is control YOUR life and keep your personal boundaries up. If he can't offer you security in the relationship, you have do what's best for you and be firm about sticking to your needs.